My Nomad Journey – Fort Worth, Texas

[Week of February 8] From Mississippi I drove across Louisiana and into Texas. I chose Fort Worth as a place to break up the drive and spend a short few days catching up and work. I had a pleasant and sunny day for driving. I should also note that the prior week there had been a massive winter storm that blew from Texas to New York. They called it the “1,000 mile storm” and the freezing temperatures, snow and ice wreaked havoc across the southeast. This is also why we had such cold weather down in Florida. As a result, driving through the region showed lots of damaged trees. Also, the combination of everything being dried out from freezing and all of the sand used on the roads and highways created a dust bowl effect for hundreds of miles.

Here’s what I did:

I arrived in the Dallas/Fort Worth metroplex mid afternoon and had to make my way across Dallas to get to Fort Worth. Traffic was crazy and I don’t miss living there. The metro has grown so much over the decades! I had booked my hotel in central Fort Worth near the zoo, parks, museums and downtown. This is one of my favorite parts of town and I was excited to have a hotel location there at the price point. It was also close walking distance to food options, which was helpful given my work schedule. I spent the weekend relaxing and walking around the area. The hotel was on the Trinity River and I used to run on those trails all the time when I was younger. I was so inspired that I went for a run for the first time in months! The weather was mild and sunny. I had such mixed feelings about being back in Fort Worth because in a sense it felt so familiar and a little appealing. But on closer reflection, I realized it wasn’t meant to be a home for me.

I don’t have close connections with my blood relatives. There’s no bad stories – we just all went our own ways and lost touch over time. Several brothers have since passed. I often think about my nephews and nieces. I sometimes consider reaching out, but then feel like I’ve abdicated that right with my absence and silence. I considered reaching out on this trip, but then decided not too, due to the limited amount of time to properly catch up, it that were to be an option. I did visit my mother’s grave briefly. While there, I left a small offering and said some important words to her and to my birth family. I wanted to send wishes of peace and prosperity to all my family, regardless of connection. I did this in my own way and felt a sense of something important as I did so. I was glad I made the time for it.

Over the next day or two I worked from the hotel room – another pleasant property – and walked around the small area I was staying in the evenings. From my bed in the evenings I searched the map to see what has changed in my old home town and in what ways it is growing.

The last night, an old high school friend (and former guest on my podcast) met me for a brief dinner and catch up conversation near my hotel. I don’t have connections from school, but we’ve maintained a light thread through the years. It was good to catch up and compare stories. The next morning, I packed up for a very long drive over to Amarillo and my next destination. I felt strangely fulfilled by my visit to my old home and also left the door open to return in the future and maybe reconnect in other ways.

Here’s what I learned:

What I learned is that I can still be moved by places that I’ve moved on from. When I was growing up in Fort Worth, I followed all the development news and every big project that was being built in the city. I was obsessed with how Fort Worth would grow into a “big city” someday. Being back there, I saw the city that I always hoped it would be. And I was jealous. I truly wished it had been like that for me when I lived there. It was cool to see and experience. Very dynamic. And then there’s the ugly side. While the wedge from downtown through the southwest has grown, developed and changed, other parts of the city are still the same. Many parts of town I saw while driving in and through were still the same. Still poor. No new developments. No new parks. No shopping centers, hotels, new homes. The neighborhood I grew up in was just as under-resourced as it had been 50 years ago. I realized that all of the resources seemed to have been invested in the more affluent part of town. Taken as its own city, it would have all the good parks, museums, food, shopping, neighborhoods, rivers…. That place was a cool city – but it wasn’t the reality of the majority. And while 1/4 of the city was thriving and robust, the rest seemed to still be waiting in line, waiting its turn. And that made me sad.

Here’s what’s next:

I’m on to Albuquerque and Las Vegas from here. I’ll drive up through Wichita Falls, Amarillo, and through eastern New Mexico into Albuquerque. I’ve never driven this route before, so I’m looking forward to the new scenery.

As always, please interact with this post. I love getting your questions, your thoughts, and your comments. I’ll reply when I’m able.

Please enjoy yourselves in this week ahead and look for another update from me about the adventures of the journey. Be well my friends!

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