My Nomad Journey – Orlando, Florida

[Week of January 11 and 18] Hold on to your seats!!! While this was supposed to be a fun trip, conference and meetup with some of my British friends, it went a very different direction!!! It’s probably a good thing that I waited a month to write about this, because now I can be more brief and reflect back with less emotion.

Here’s what I did:

From Durham and Charlotte, I made my way down to Orlando Florida. I was booked to attend a conference of Sober Influencers, where I would meet up with 2 of my friends from the UK – Janey Lee Grace and Polly Lovell. They come from my Sober Coach training circles and it was an opportunity to reconnect with them and to stay connected to the Sober Coaching/Influencing community, since I’m trained in these coaching skills. I was also surprised to see another US-based colleague there, Jaime Anderson! I arrived in Orlando a day early, settled into my motel and took care of some work and errands.

On Wednesday, after a day of work calls, I met up with Janey and Polly at the conference venue to have a drink and dinner. It was a great reunion and we made our plans for the conference the next day. I headed back to my motel and, as I turned into a busy intersection 1 block away, MY. CAR. DIED. AGAIN. Great… It was exactly the same situation as the prior 2 times. I won’t go into detail about all the emotions that went through me and the thought spirals that began. I called AAA, got myself towed to the motel, contacted Polly and Janey to let them know I would have to miss the conference the next day so that I could attend to the car repairs and spent some time attending to my elevated anxiety levels and, frankly, grief!

Since this issue had now repeated itself 3 times, and since I had already paid for 2 separate repairs to the amount of $1700, I decided it was time to take it to the dealership, so they could figure out what was wrong. I paid a hefty sum to have it towed to the dealership and then took a rideshare over to the conference. I was able to salvage the afternoon, spend time with my friends, make some new introductions and get inspired by the motivational content and sessions. We had dinner/drinks together after the event and I took a rideshare back to my motel.

The rest is a LONG story, so I will just highlight. The problem was diagnosed, an extremely high cost assessed, and a delivery date set. I should have my car back by Friday (one day away). What ended up happening was that the delivery date kept pushing back, the cost of the repairs went up from $2800, to $4300, to then $6700!!! They kept presenting new, expensive reasons for the cost. The whole ordeal stretched out almost a week. I ended up renting a car and moving hotel locations so I would be more comfortable and able to get around and make do with the situation. I spent some time downtown and in the Lake Eola neighborhood adjacent to downtown. That part saved me. At the end of the ordeal, I was put in a very difficult position of having to decide whether to buy a new car and take on a car payment again. If I had known where this was going, I might have made different choices. But the dealership took advantage of my situation and limitations and coerced me into buying a new car, of their choosing, in order to get the maximum trade in value. (They would only cover the cost of the repairs “as trade in” if I purchased one of the cars they wanted me to buy.) I made the hard choice and now have a new car.

The car is nice and I am grateful to have something new, covered under warranty, and to have the peace of mind that comes with that. At the same time, I also mourn the car that I really enjoyed and some of the features that I loved about it. I also am not thrilled with having a car payment and higher car insurance cost. I’m also not thrilled with having a white car. They’ve never been my favorite, but it was what was available.

At the time of this writing, the new car has driving me all the way across the country and I’ve slowly adjusted to the new “fit”. I express my gratitude to the car often, for what it creates for me. I also still catch myself in my anger toward the whole situation. To be honest, I did not want a new car and the increased cost that goes with it. As a small business owner, every dollar counts.

I should also acknowledge that, during this redirect of time and plans, I took advantage of some of the time to catch up on my substacks (the last batch that were posted in a row were all a product of one of my days that was scheduled for driving, being redirected to catching up). 

Here’s what I learned:

To build on that last sentence above, this situation revealed and taught me a whole lot about myself. First, I want to acknowledge how much I loved my old car. Having to make this decision, in a way that felt sudden, was similar to losing a loved one. When I posted the picture of the empty trunk after cleaning out my belongings, I felt a pang of sadness. I thought of all the miles that car and I have traveled together over the last 10 years – 92,000 miles!!! I’m allowing myself to grieve that loss. I recognize how my money and scarcity fears still drive my decisions. I recognized how much I was/am holding on to trying to control all the parts of my life. I recognize how much I judge myself for also being sad/hurt/mad about having to make a decision that was helpful, even if I didn’t want it. I had to spend a LOT of time looking at myself, my reactions and my beliefs about life, myself, fairness and so much more. I recognize that the belief that was wrapping around this whole situation was victimhood, and I was holding onto that tightly. And understandably. In hindsight, I believe that moment was a critical one for me. I had to go through something so mentally difficult in order to start to get tired of “playing safe” and “keeping small”. This began a process of looking differently at my life and my place in the world.

Here’s what’s next:

Up next, I’m heading down to Miami and Boynton Beach to visit Daniel, Sophia and Jennifer again. (I just saw them back in November, but it’s a good place to go back and visit in the winter time.) I’ll be petsitting for Jennifer while she travels. I will also spend some time with one of my clients for some planning and work projects.

After Miami/South Florida, I will be working my way back to the West. I have an in-person training gig in Las Vegas the week of February 15th, so I have 2 weeks to slowly get myself there. I will break up the drive time at key destinations. I will also spend several days at each to allow for full work days, with no drive time.

More to come!

As always, please interact with this post. I love getting your questions, your thoughts, and your comments. I’ll reply when I’m able.

Please enjoy yourselves in this week ahead and look for another update from me about the adventures of the journey. Be well my friends!

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